Helene and the Glove

Helene Atsuko
glove model's own

Liverpool: Napalm to the Bone

Off to Liverpool, from whence one half of my family came, or at least paused in their journey long enough to have children. A journey that apparently encompassed the Carribean, although really we call came from Africa; and before then were no doubt a virus floating through space. Were we one virus particle, or millions? Did we split up, or were we always apart?

But anyway, I took along a bunch of cameras, including a 590nm-converted Canon 10D. This isn't the same 10D that pops up in Infrared X, although it's essentially identical; that one was converted for 720nm. A 590nm filter lets in a lot more colour, which is both a blessing and a curse. A blessing because the skies and trees etc are especially vivid, but a curse because if you don't like orange skies and blue plants (or vice-versa) you're going to have to get jiggy with the colour balance. Which I did.


Unfortunately it was overcast, which isn't ideal for infrared - the colours really come alive when the sun shines on them. But it's Liverpool in November, what did I expect? Criticising Liverpool in November for being overcast is a bit like criticising sharks for munching on people; it's in their nature.

"It is your character

Deep in your nature
Take one example
Sample and hold
Romance and replace
The lack in yourself
It is your nature"
PiL: The Suit

The Mersey there, where the beat came from, and beyond it the Wirral, which taunts the people of Liverpool just as the moon taunted the ape-men in 2001. One day the people of Liverpool will build machines that can cross the water. But until then they fight for the Gods they made.

Ten Songs with Baby replaced by Hitler

It is a truth universally acknowledged that if you replace the word "love" in a pop song with the word "lunch", the world becomes a funnier place. It's less well-known that if you replace the word "baby" with "Hitler", the world becomes even funnier. As I shall now demonstrate, for the first time on the internet, right here and now:

Ten Songs with Baby replaced by Hitler
1. Hitler, Can I Hold You Tonight?
2. Hitler Did a Bad, Bad Thing
3. Be My Hitler
4. Hitler's Got Back
5. Hitler Love
6. Hitler Hitler
7. Hitler Come Back
8. Hitler, I Don't Care
9. Hitler, I Love Your Way
10. I Love to Love (but Hitler just Wants to Dance)

Bonus:
11. Where Are you Hitler?

At this point I'm probably going to be banned in Germany. But I don't get any hits from Germany, so I don't care. Besides, the essence of humour is subversion, the more violent the funnier. And there are few more violent things than pop culture.

EDIT: But does it work the other way around? Let's see...

1. Baby Has Only Got One Ball
2. Springtime for Baby
3. Baby was a Vegetarian
4. Who do you Think you are Kidding, Mr Baby?
5. ...

I seem to have run out of songs with Hitler in them. Der Baby's Face? Baby with your Rhythm Stick? Overall the results aren't as funny. The Hitler-Baby rotation is a one-way mirror.

I've always wanted to write The Hitler-Baby rotation is a one-way mirror, but I've never had the chance. Until now.

Obscured by Birds

The Sousse Palace, in Sousse, Tunisia. Filmed back in March, at which time it was completely empty. Music performed with Andre Michele's Tonematrix, which is great fun.

Parachutes

Whilst filming bits of Britain's Nuclear Challenge - everybody has to start somewhere - I stumbled on these people falling from the sky, and filmed them. With a Canon 5D MkII, using a Tamron 28-75mm f/2.8. Music performed with Andrew Michael's lovely Pulsate, which fits the scene.