Tuesday, 20 September 2011

No New Star in the Sky


"The sun has got his hat on
the sun has got his hat on
and he's coming out to play"

Let's assume that the hat is made out of stone, so that it doesn't catch fire. Why would the sun wear a hat? To keep off the sun? Hmm? Doesn't make sense.

I wonder what kind of games the sun would play. Not cricket. The stumps would catch fire and furthermore she is a woman. Certainly not swimming, which would be disastrous, although I imagine she would look nice in a swimsuit.

After a bit of thought I came to the conclusion that the sun's preferred pastime would be hot air ballooning, which makes perfect sense. She could use the balloon to travel through space, and return to her home in the middle of the solar system. Hopefully before all the planets have whizzed off into the universe. "When the cat's away, the mice will play"

I picture the sun looking like Ms Pac-Man, with a big yellow body and little spindly arms and legs and a big mouth and a little bow on her head. Snacking on asteroids and other space debris that pass by. She sends out dangerous rays, but it's not her fault, she's just over-enthusiastic.

What does Mr Moon do for fun? The obvious answer is ice skating. Mr Moon is locked in a romantic triangle with the Earth and the Sun. He has the Earth; the Earth loves him, but he wants the Sun instead. The Sun is haughty and selfish, not really bad, just very spoiled and uncaring. She is not capable of loving someone else, and the Moon can perhaps understand this, but she lives in the big city, and has money, and the Moon is seduced by this, his rational mind is clouded. He is drawn to her like a moth to a flame. Moon-moth to a Sunflame will be the title of a forthcoming blog post.

One day he'll realise that he can never have her, that she is just a dream, but by then the Earth will have been smashed to bits by a giant asteroid, and the Moon will have nothing left, and it was all his fault. If he had stayed behind he might have deflected the asteroid with his gravity, or taken the hit himself. But no, he had to go chasing the unattainable, and that is what he got.